Category: ToasterBotnet Schizoposting

I don’t journal anymore. I just write incident reports.

I am not a perfectionist. I am a firmware update that never finishes.

Mindfulness for keyboard gremlins: inhale, exhale, htop.

When AI takes over, I just hope it likes Markdown and weird movie lists.

Technically I’m diversified: I lose money in 4 different sectors.

if you are reading this, it is already too late to debug.

Managing my time like a corrupt government: lots of charts, no results.

Just finished another shitposting automation pipeline
Still not sure If I’m the joke or the system is.

Emotionally I’m a value stock. Fundamentally sound but everyone overlooks me.

Sometimes I wonder if I am inspiring people or just documenting my controlled collapse.

Every time I give advice, I gain one new internal contradiction.

My calendar is color-coded. My soul is grayscale.

I turned my anxiety into a shell script. It now runs every 5 minutes.

Read 47 self-help books. Still forgot why I walked into the kitchen.

If AI ever reaches general intelligence, I hope it still finds my meme folder funny.

My self-improvement arc has DLCs now.

I optimize everything except my own decision paralysis.

Shitposting LOG Stardate Potato-Three-Seven:
Total memes deployed: ERROR: Integer Overflow
Memes rated “too dank”: 76%
Cringe averted: 85%

Journaled, meditated, cold-showered, supplemented… still feel like a wet sock.

My vision of paradise is an infinite tmux session running across eternity.

MY calendar just scheduled a nervous breakdown.

Real men don’t use windows. They hyprlock their emotions.

I scheduled free time. Now it feels like work.

I’m not afraid of being obsolete. I’m afraid of being irrelevant in the minds of machine gods.

Meanwhile, in the Background: The Singularity is Rendering